my street runs into what is commonly known as a t-section at the main drag. the 100 or soo feet between one corner to another on all three sides has in big white paint “keep clear”. stipulating, that for traffic to make left/right turns onto the main drag or a left turn onto my street, the “keep” clear sign alert people to allow this to happen. Now you won’t see “keep clear” printed on every t-section that you run into — however since the off-ramp light is located about a block from my street, traffic gets heavy and backed up and it’s a royal pain in the ass to make a left onto the main drag or to make a left onto my street.
now the bitch is, is that people are dumber than box of rocks when it comes to driving. too many times when i have come home from work, i have to honk like a mad person because some moron has his tricked-out pinto in the intersection that says “keep clear”. finally, it ends up with the person behind him backing up enough so that I can get through.
there are other “keep clear” intersections that people don’t bother to “read”. one is off of Grand Ave in Lake Merritt, by where Darryl lives. I have to make a left onto a side street to take him home, however since the street between grand ave and lakeshore ave is curved, and the street i need to get onto is a side street, it’s impossible to do so if traffic is backed up from the light. there is only room for about 2 cars before the side street begins. since it’s such a busy intersection, again the “keep clear” is a signal to anyone with half a brain that others need to get through and that at red lights, people should be behind the white lines. think this happens? Fuck no. Yesterday a woman stopped in the middle of the intersection, so that no one could turn left onto the side street and no one could turn left onto the main street. I honked and she finally got off her duff and moved her car up. Other people will blatantly sit there and NOT move. Once I saw a cop who turned on his flashers to get through the intersection and then turned them off as he continued driving. That, Darryl and I both thought, was completely and utterly unfair.
the one thing i have learned since i have lived out in california, is how negligible people are when driving. like when i rolled into this woman’s car doing less than 2 miles an hour at the toll both to get on the Bay bridge. she attempted to claim “neck injuries” until she found out that my insurance for that day had lapsed (it was picked up a day or so later. a fuck up by the insurance company). another example is when my roommate cathleen was driving home late one night, her blood sugar dropped and she ran into a parked truck. she left a note and her business card to get the matter resolved. when the person didn’t call her for several days, she walked over to his house (the accident occurred right around the corner from our house), the guy didn’t even realize that he had been hit. when he took his work truck into be appraised, they said over 2k worth of damage. 2k worth of damage to a small hit, on a work truck that was covered in bondo and had other dents and scratches? cathleen finally got the guy to take his truck to a reputable mechanic and the appraisal was for about 600 bucks (this is cali after all).
and it doesn’t stop there.
arrogant mother fuckers who drive like mad people during torrents of rain and think that gravitational laws don’t apply to them, people who will drive on shoulders for blocks to cut into traffic during high peak times, people who make lane changes without looking. the list goes on and on.
i had read somewhere that if you can drive in the bay area, you can drive anywhere. I’ve become such a good little defensive driver that i about ready to make a career change and start driving professionally.
beautiful day in the neighborhood
san francisco (nee bay area) is infamous for being absolutely beautiful one day, rainy the next and than back to being beautiful again. Wednesday (2.24.99) was so beautiful, i got out off of BART one stop early on my way back to work. i stopped at the San Francisco shopping center and walked down market, enjoying the beautiful day mixed with the always precious site of homelessness and yuppies who convene together on the sidewalks. the wind was blowing just right so that the usual smell of urine was distant.
while walking down the street, i felt this sense of happiness i hadn’t felt in a particular time. I’m still in a quandary about what to do with my life — and i feel that i need to make a decision soon. but the rub is that looking back at the past history of me and seeing the all too familiar patterns that keep cropping up. I’ve been running in this rut now for about four years (long before cali came into the view) and almost every new year, i say the same things “this year is going to be different.” but it never feels like it is.
patterns are everywhere. i read old journal entries from 95,96 (written journal not on-line) and see that my bitch and moans then are the same bitch and moans now. i look through past on-line journals and see striking if not similar patterns in a comparison to month to month of then and now.
i get confused.
I’m not quite sure what i need to be doing. thoughts keep going through my head such as “Justin is the best there is” or “are you going to school for yourself or to prove something to someone” or “you are getting old Lisa. pretty soon you will be 40! (14 more years)”. i run such a gamut from self-pity to being self-righteous it’s almost sickening. i can never make up my mind exactly what i want. my mantra has just been “school, school, school” but i don’t know what i want to do with my life after that. the choices are so overwhelming that i freak and just do nothing. i think about all the stuff i want to do, and feel guilty when people attempt to convince me that i shouldn’t have to do it alone.
then i hear about ex’s who are getting married (those evil fuckers) and i feel like something is inherently wrong with me.
i used to have this strong sense of “worth” to the extent that i knew how my life was going to be going — mainly with my love life. i knew what i wanted from someone and that i was strong enough to say good-bye if it didn’t happen. then i hear other people who seem least likely to be in love — be in love and it sounds almost clinical. i can’t imagine my life with someone, let alone of being in love again. it seems such a 180 degree turn of who i am now — that i fear that my worst fear has come undone.
I’ve become afraid.
last night i talked to my ex Chad (from downpour on my soul) and felt strange. the longing in his voice matched the longing in my own voice — our voices to each other still did the same things physically to us that it had in the past. we talked a lot about our relationship and all the fun times we had and reminiscing about when he was living in Pittsburgh and when i would go see him. over 3 years have passed since we have last talked on the phone and about the same since we last saw each other physically. he’s got a new girl right now and he seems to be completely and honestly in love with her — but i keep getting the sinking feeling of what “could have happened” if i hadn’t done what i did.
I think about that now a lot — about the mens I’ve dated and of those ones, the ones that i had the most significant relationships with. i could have been happy with any of them in the long-term sense — and lord knows i was wildly in love with all of them at the time we were together. but shit always gets in the way and i always end up getting my heart-broken (often for trivial things)
Month: February 1999
sick
i’ve been home since last Wednesday (2.17.99) with some sort of bronchial/flu/cold dealie going on. I get this every year — and I’m sure if I wasn’t smoking, I wouldn’t get it as bad as I do. So lesson learned today folks that lisa is quitting smoking. have to. i can’t quite get this coughing up my lungs by an early death. i’ve called into work and wrote (well, i’ve been meaning to!) to my prof’s telling them what’s going on. I feel horrible. Today I attempted to take Justin shoe shopping and nearly fainted at the store. I can’t move far and was afraid to drive home. I called in sick tomorrow, planning on even more bed rest and fluids. The only positive thing this has given me is a much needed loss of 5 lbs. score. not water weight — but fat. woo. will make my goal of 10 lbs this month.
so this is part the reason why people haven’t heard from me. one frantic person thought i was personally ignoring him. Nerp. (Kruton, I’m not speaking about you okay?) I haven’t had much energy to do much except sleep, read and watch movies back to back. Reading should equate studying. it doesn’t. instead i’ve been imbibing on all the heinlein books that i have in my library. which doesn’t account for much — really just five or six of his main tomes. I have found though that even though i greedily read his stuff a few years back, i’m not finding it as “entertaining” as i did then. i don’t know what’s changed. it’s still funny and in many ways, many of what he says hits the nail on the head — but from what i’ve understood in the past with old Heinlein lovers — he comes and goes in spurts. heh. literally. i’m not really being dragged into anything “new” via lit as of late. i’ve been reading spurts of Plato/Aristotle/Socrates (not necessarily in that order) for classes and of course, course work. I tried reading a book that i bought several years ago called “Pooh and the Philosophers” in which the author claims “all of modern western philosophy leads up to Winnie the Pooh.” However, when I bought the book several years ago (as a gag gift to myself) I thought it would be “cute” as all theories are possible.
however, when i delved into the book last night — i found it to be boring and tedious. i did not see any Socratic/platonic (heh) view between Pooh and freaking honey. the author — who teaches philosophy at Cambridge natch — has something up his ass — or in his brain. or maybe he’s smoking too much damn crack.
michael wants me to come to his philosophy club on Tuesday nights. he says i have to back up what is say with proof and meaning — none of which i hold dear to my heart (as if!).
however, i get the feeling that it’s nothing more than #philosophy in real life — with just as many ego-iq’s as the channel holds. should be fun. so i will probably go.
defcon
Jonathan is trying to get me to go to defcon 7 this year. i have no idea why. he just think it’s cool for me to go. i went to defcon 5. and i really don’t see a reason _to_ go. see friends? maybe. but i can see them anytime. besides, this whole thing isn’t my bag. Jonathan is just strange. even though he looks like chris o’donell.
look-alikes
several people have commented that i look like minnie driver. i wish to hell that i looked like minnie! damn is she fione or what here? anyway, basically people think i look like her or tiffani-amber theissen. and mainly because while both are brunettes, they also have wide faces such that i have. except i chopped all my hair off a few months ago in an effort to go shorter — and then thought about going shorter still — and regret cutting it off. i always fucking do that!
this is so banal and pointless. i just wanted something to show minnie’s picture. *meow*
i’m going to bed.
night.
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ps: nyquil gives you some strange ass dreams. that’s all i’m saying because that is all i freaking remember.
strange currencies
bitchasshoe.org is up.
friday (2.12.99), i was standing outside of slip.net smoking my cigarette when this woman came up to me. she started talking about how for valentines day, her office holds a baking contest, where the first prize is $50 bucks. and after the contest, she says, they go into the lunch room and eat all the goodies. after she finished that sentence, she walked back into the building, leaving me standing there still staring at the space where she was standing. i turned around and stared at the building across the street, wondering if it was worth $400,000 dollars for a loft to live there.
every sunday morning, justin and i make pancakes and bacon. but just not regular pork bacon — oohhh no. we make Jenni-O turkey bacon (95% fat free!). we love this crap so much, we usually make 1 1/2 packages to 2 packages and then munch on it the rest of the day.
we were out of a few items, so i said i was going to the store. i skipped going to lucky’s, because i always get hit on, so instead i went to safeway. i was looking for potatoe soup to use in dinner tonight, when this little short woman (about 4’6″) asked me (6′) to grab a box of pie crusts for her. she thanked me and went on her way.
james says “hi!”
my friend james (who runs DarkNebula) invited justin and i to go on a trek to Yosemite today. however, the roads were so bad that they have closed down access and if you could make it up, they recommended snow chains.
the bitch punked out on us by emailing me later this morning to say that he wasn’t going to make it AND he wasn’t going to come over and spend V-Day with us — the bitch.
but he wanted me to send you his regards.
c:>format c:
i had gotten so frustrated with my software crashing on me, windows was having issues and my system was running so damn slow, that i bought a six pack of hefeweizen and moved everything off my c: drive to my other drives and zip. when that was all completed and i had no personal data left, i reformatted the fucker.
there is something almost pure about having a blank harddrive.
i copied my start-up files from a diskette onto c, and rebooted. it started giving me issues of “non-system diskette. please hit enter to reboot.” what the fuck? i rebooted and went into bios, and saw that it was attempting to boot from the cd-rom. changed the format of boot options and tried again. same error. i started with it booting from the a: drive. same error. i started to panic. i do this on a daily basis. i’ve done hundreds of machines this way — there should be no reason why it’s giving me error messages. i checked and re-checked everything over again. nothing is wrong or incorrect. i grabbed my sony restore disk. last ditch effort. however, i go with sony’s restore disk, and i’m stuck with fucking 95 (instead of 98) and all the bullshit crap they put on. in a very last ditch effort before giving up to the MAN i stick in the 98 cd-rom and pray. it boots and installs 98 effortlessly.
i have been saved.
now, i’m not some neophyte who doesn’t know what they are doing — i’ve been working with computers for eons (so it feels like). and i have done this type of thing a few thousand times — so imagine my perplexity that if this wasn’t working how fucked up that would be! well, for once i would like to thank god (b. gates) and the ability to boot off of cd-roms. mental note: cd-r burn more copies of winders 98 for personal use.
but the only thing i was really concerned about — was my taxes. i had done them via turbotax. after you submit the information, they tell you to check back within 24-48 hours and then finish it. well, i reformatted my computer, and saved my files. only when i re-installed turbotax, it wouldn’t accept my un-lock code — so off to calling Inuit to get the damn code and explain what was going on. the irony, is that while i’m waiting for tech support, i figure out how to get my old info back and finish with my taxes.
the really rad thing?
IRS is going to deposit my refund on or by 2.19.99. Now that is damn QUICK! 🙂 i’m not having issues with the MAN today!
moloch
i often write stuff and save it, never to be published in any format. such as i used to write for f.u.c.k., but it’s been nearly a year since i’ve given jericho anything. sometimes f.u.c.k. submissions became a entry update. and i’ve been writing in my journal more. i’ve got time to kill on BART — i need something to occupy me. i’ve been working on lisa 2000, but it’s not finished yet.
i just checked out the work in progress i started on a few weeks ago — i can’t believe i wrote so much in such a little time.
i hope to have it finished one day.
but in the interim, i’ll put up what i have.
erm, maybe not. i’m sick of hearing about 404 errors.
i’m audi 5000 g.
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Open letter to the hacking community, from Adam Penenberg
Feb. 8, 1999
Open letter to the hacking community:
Last week, Steve Silberman of Wired News called to tell me he and I and some other journalists had been duped by a psuedo-hacker named Christian Valor, AKA se7en. In April 1998, I had posted a piece on the Forbes Digital Tool web site about Valor¢s kiddie porn vigilantism and the fact that law enforcement knew what he was doing, but turned a blind eye. Cool story. Too bad it turned out not to be true.
I was certainly in good company. Steve also had written about Valor’s exploits, as had Newsday, the Independent in London, etc. Both Steve and I received letters from se7en’s ex-girlfriend simultaneously last week, but Steve got on to the story first. I was out of town. Sad to say, he and I were the only ones to respond to her letter. I told Steve I wouldn¢t post anything until his story hit. (See “Kid-Porn Vigilante Hacked Media http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/news/1999/02/17789).
I can¢t comment on how the Steve or the Independent or Newsday conducted their research, but I would like to share with all of you how I did mine, and what went wrong. I¢m sure there are lessons to be learned.
As you may or may not know, I am no stranger to taking on journalists I think have concocted stories out of thin air. I broke the Stephen Glass story, the associate editor of The New Republic who made up a story on hackers¯and was later discovered to have made up some three dozen stories for a number of well-known publications (See “Lies, damn lies and fiction”:http://www.forbes.com/1998/05/11/otw3.html). I also took on Beth Piskora of The New York Post, who I believe made up a sexy tech story on Organized Crime setting up phony companies for Y2K remediation, who then, she claims, inserted software to divert money from bank accounts (read: clients) to mob-controlled accounts. (See “Phantom mobsters”:http://www.forbes.com/1998/08/28/feat.html). This canard was picked up by Vanity Fair in a recent feature on Y2K. Vanity Fair has yet to admit it published a lie.
I hate it when you nail a journalist and instead of coming clean, he or she hides. This is what both Glass and Piskora have done. That’s why I’m writing this note.
For my story (Kiddie porn vigilante: http://www.forbes.com/1998/04/17/feat.html) I knew I couldn’t get on IRC and traffic in kiddie porn on a Forbes computer. You remember what happened to that journalist for NPR who did, and is now had to plead guilty to a felony¯all because he was ostensibly researching a story? So I relied on law enforcement, EHAP, and NAMBLA. I called literally 10 law enforcement officials who said they studied under Valor in one of his security courses. On the record, they would all vouch for se7en¢s hacking skills. Off the record, they all said they knew what he was doing but they didn¢t care. Everyone hates kiddie porn traffickers.
I also talked to EHAP, and they told me they were distressed by se7en’s actions, because it gave hackers a bad name. Se7en should turn them over to the cops or the ISPs, they said, not break the law in going after them. They didn’t say he was a fraud.
I also contacted NAMBLA through its web site. I asked if anyone knew a hacker named se7en, who was purportedly going after kiddie porn traffickers on IRC. I received a cryptic response, something along the lines of, “Yes, some of our members have been complaining about this guy. We just want to be left alone.” End of conversation. He refused to turn over any other details.
So I felt confident that with all this cross-checking that Valor was who he said he was. Obviously, I made a mistake. I think the most important lesson I learned is that law enforcement doesn’t have a clue what really goes on in hacking circles; they are not good sources for this. I also now won’t write a hacking story unless I can meet the hacker face-to-face and actually see evidence that I can then verify with other hackers¯or computer security experts I trust. This is how I approached my story for Forbes magazine on the NY Times hack that ran last fall (available online at: .
If you want to send me taunting email, telling me what a fool I was, feel free. I’m at apenenberg@forbes.com. But you can’t possibly be harder on me than I’ve been on myself this past week. You live, you learn.
Sincerely,
Adam Penenberg
Senior Editor, Forbes Magazine
wired, se7en, and me
http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/news/1999/02/17789
There is obviously more to the story then what is being said.
My few comments in the article doesn’t show the nearly 2 hours of interviewing and email between me and Steve Silberman. there is a completely different story that isn’t being printed, and hopefully, at this point, it will get out. my reaction to the article is that i think Steve did a fab job — however se7en isn’t the mature nor the “grown up” he claims to be. while i realize journalistic integrity, but se7en comes out smelling like a rose much more then he needs to.
the main question i have received as to “why” i “dissed” se7en:
when you live with someone who not only lied to you, to your mutual friends, dismissed his own friendships along having a tendency to be completely sadistic: you wish them nothing but bad karma. se7en knew he lied not only about the kiddie-porn, but about everything. he would tell me things about his past, his friendships, peers that would be absolute and blatant lies. He would make me ‘promise’ not to say anything — and yet my own discreet searching found out that nothing he said matched — and when confronted would claim that it had been covered up or distorted to conceal the truth.
this was longtime in coming. se7en and i have been broken up for nearly two years — so it’s not the disgruntled girlfriend bit.
if anything, the one lesson i want everyone to learn is that do not always believe what you read. no matter who publishes it. do your own research and find out the truth yourself — because it is out there. (queuing up X-files music).
this site has gone from receiving 25-50 unique hits a day to a unique hit every 30 seconds since the story broke at 3am PST. If you are having problems pulling up anything on the site, smack me on the ass and let me know.
love,
me
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PS: update: 1:41 PM
Getting lots of email from “supporters” and comments from others. Received an email from Adam at Forbes who has requested that I post an open letter that he wants the world to see. There it is. 🙂
Steve posted an update to the original story. Nothing new — basically he calls Christian a “fraud”. 🙂 Score!
blatant self promotion
I’ve been thinking for awhile about giving back to those who have helped supported me since I’ve been doing the lisa chronicles. So i decided that the coolest thing to give would be t-shirts to all the subscribers of the list. T-shirts are cool — we all love them. So what better way to honor those who helped me then to give them something back?
Here is the deal:
- There is currently 28 people subscribed to the list. Once I have hit 50 subscribers by February 28th, 1999, I will be sending out an announcement to the list on gathering info (mailing address and t-shirt size).
- If I don’t hit my mark by that said date, I’ll be sending out an email anyway to those subscribed to the list and requesting specific information. Any t-shirts left (I make 50 shirts, there are 10 left as only 40 people are subscribed), will be SOLD for the cost of the shirt plus shipping and handling.
- Recap: If you want a shirt, and you are on the list, you get one FREE. If you are not on the list, and want a shirt, you will have to PAY for it.
The shirts will be cool. I’ve already done the design. It’s just a matter of me buying the supplies and making them.
Some things to consider:
- Going over the hit mark: At this point, I will do it on a first come first served basis. If I get more requests then what I’ve stipulated, I will work out a trade agreement or barter or something. I’m po’, so I can’t afford obviously to give shirts to everyone.
- Concern over privacy: this is understandable. I run four mailing lists and I have never had the inclination to sell my subscribers to anyone. I hate spam just like anyone else. If you don’t want me to know that you are reading this (as I’m familiar at who is coming to the site by dns/ip number — not necessarily the person) then I guess you lose out 🙂
If I’m leaving anything out, please let me know. I’ll add more as I think about this.
This is obviously a blatant request to get more subscribers to the list as well as readership. But no one said i had morals or ethics! 😉
Now, don’t be sending me information on how you want a shirt and blah blah blah now. Wait till February 28th or subscribe to the damn list! 😉
PS: update: 7:49 PM PST
20+ new subscribers to the chronicles.
700+ unique hits.
Shitload of email.
I’ve been totally and utterly fascinated by watching people come and go. I don’t know what I was expecting — but again I’m not letting this eat up my life. I’ve been responding to email for the most part of the day — and now it’s nearing 8pm and I still haven’t finished my physics that is due on Wednesday (in which I will probably have a test — fail — and I can blame it on my own damn self for not having the will to stop mucking with the site and doing email). But anyway, a lot of positive feedback — a lot of new subscribers — a lot of contact from old friends I haven’t spoken to in years.
I don’t know what the fuck is going to happen next — several people are referring me to being famous. hardly. i am what i am. i have a story (or 10 or 15) to tell — i happened to believe in the truth and i happen to think that this time is the most right of any.
the one thing i’ve been promising myself, long before jericho or shipley joined in the fray was sitting down and writing the story myself — publish it on my site and sit back and let the cookies crumbs fall as they may. i’m bewildered by the sudden popularity and also the kind words (again — the article doesn’t show but a few comments on 2+ hours of interviewing I did) from strangers calling me a “hero”. beats me — i like to think i’m extraordinary — but — doesn’t everyone else?
i’m surprised I didn’t hear from a few people — namely Christian and CPM. But that doesn’t surprise me. Christian named me as being the only “witness” to his attacks and I derailed that. CPM offers unflattering information about me in her book – based on the fact that “se7en hurt you” deal. Jericho says that there is nothing I can do to stop it — obviously the book is already in fucking print!
blatant self promotion
several (like october) months ago — a friend of mine found it hard to keep up with TLC via web — so he inquired about an email version. I set one up — and invited those who were interested to sign up. Mainly people I knew or knew of signed up — no big deal.\
A few weeks ago — i thought “wouldn’t it be great that if i could give something back to those who gave to me?” and came up with the t-shirt idea. So I proposed a project: 50 subscribers by february 28th would get a t-shirt. however, the problem is that many people, since the article came out, s*bbed to the list _basically_ for the shirt. that kind of pisses me off.
- I can only afford 50 shirts. I’m full time student and working full time. A lot of people have been behind me since this has been around in 1995 (yes not a typo). I feel that it’s only fair to them to give something back.
- 20 new subscribers today ALONE. one person even went so far as emailing me his snail mail address to get a shirt now. Hello! the shirts aren’t going to be made until the end of the month! goddamnit.
So here is the new deal. The offer still stands for the first 50 people who subscribe. Anyone after that up until February 28th will be given the option to either buy, at cost, the shirt or barter. I love books/music. I need more books music. One of these years i’ll put a wish list up and people can pick and choose from that. sounds fair? So if you are interested in signing up — be forewarned that if you are after 50 — then no free shirt.
fizics is calling me.
i have to get off the damn interweb.
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tax time
I just finished doing my taxes. Woopie! 🙂 See, when I lived in the state of Michigan, if I didn’t get my city/state/federal forms sent to me, I could either go to the library or the post office to pick them up. Since neither Justin nor myself received our forms this year, we went to the library and the post office to pick them up. NEITHER places had forms. They both said that I had to go to the IRS building, in downtown Oakland, to pick up said forms. Which of course is only open for four hours a day, every other Tuesday and Thursday and the hours are like from 10-3, which won’t work because I’m in class! So, fuck that.
I downloaded and used TurboTax, and having my taxes electronically filed. It’s kind of rad. Sitting here in my jammies doing this all on line. Since I only had one W-2 and the report for my student interest loan, i was done in 10 minutes. I had of course figured it out on paper before hand. No use getting worked up over freaking tax time unless I was getting money back from the MAN!
downsizing
Women’s clothing. I know I know, we beat this into the ground before. But it just irks the living PISS out of me about how designers decide on sizing. Last night, Justin and I had gone to the mall and just went window looking. Found a shirt that would have been totally rad to wear to a party I was *supposed* to go tonight. Figured that since Cathleen and I were planning on making a shirt out of some material I have, I decided *not* to get it (or the matching skirt). Wake up this morning, and do errands. Cathleen doesn’t have enough time to make the shirt — that’s fine, I can go purchase it at the mall. Drive to the mall and buy said shirt along with a matching skirt and pants. Come home and try them on. NOTHING FIT! I had grabbed the right size, but it was still _too_ small. Cathleen loved the shirt. She tried it on and it fit her! She’s a size M and I’m an XL. Does this shit make any fucking sense to you whatsoever?
A few months (or 6) ago, Justin and I had gone to another mall and bought a skirt at a shop. The skirt was labeled 3XL. It was a store that was dedicated to funky fashions for us voluptuous women. Get home, the skirt is a size too _small_. 3XL. I started having issues. Cathleen tried on the skirt, and it fit her JUST FINE!
It just doesn’t make sense!
migration
back in December, for Christmas, danny had gotten my belly button pierced. this wasn’t the first time it was done — i had it pierced in january of 1996 in pennsylvania. however, over time, since the piercing was so shallow, it had eventually became painful as it started to migrate out.
when i had gone to get it done the second time around, ryne (piercer extraodinair) had pierced above the old scar tissue and made it more deep. now he didn’t express any concern for it. other than using a barbell other than a hoop would be better for me as well as making sure that i was taking care of it.
it’s starting to migrate again.
it frustrates me because i really love having it pierced — however it’s getting extremely painful. when i kept checking it, i realized that it had migrated to the point that it was now below the scar tissue — not above it when ryne had pierced it. i tried having Justin take it out — but his fingers were to big to grasp the balls at the end of the barbells. cathleen finally took it out for me. it was humorous. i was standing above the heater in our living room as she pushed and prodded the barbell to loosen it. my robe gaped open and i stood there wincing.
however, i am too fucking stubborn. i still have all my jewelry from when i had various other body parts pierced, so i was able to slide a 16g hoop through the hole a few hours later. I can’t get the suspension ball on, but I’m keeping it pierced goddamnit! if it looks like it’s going to eventually come out of my flesh — then I will remove it. I really want to keep it pierced goddamnit. I think though what I will end up doing is piercing the bottom of the belly button or going horizontal through it. I think I like that idea much better. I never had problems with anything else being pierced — I don’t know WHY it keeps migrating out.
the irony of this is that recently the AMA released along with the ADA a study on tongue piercing, saying it could lead to AIDS and other blood born diseases. WTF?
Now I realize that tongue piercing isn’t for everyone — however the chief concern for people who plan on doing it is the “problems” with dental care and what not to their teeth. Horror stories have filtered back (thanks to the interweb) about how people have chipped, loosen, swallowed teeth due to a piercing that was done incorrectly. My own piercing was done safely at the most respected place in the Bay area. However, I have a small mouth (gee –) and even though I kept sizing down the gauge and the length of the barbell, it was still too big for my mouth. I suddenly got worried about the repercussions of what was going to happen — my mother paid 10k for my dental work (braces, and what not) and I love my teeth. So 7 months later, out I took the barbell out for good.
I want to get it repierced again — but chances are I probably will not. I know that if I move back to Michigan, Danny has the hookup at a few good bod-mod places — they were the ones who did my nipples originally.
neoplanet
I first started using neoplanet as a browser last summer when it was first released. For some reason, I took it off my system. However, taking a look at their website and seeing how they had improved it, I decided to download and run it again. It is only 2MB in size. I’m not kidding. It however uses IE’s engine as the background process — which blows big fat hairy balls. But, i love the look and feel of how it works. So, my pages shouldn’t look any different to you — and I still have netscape on my system. If, however, you encounter an problem, please let me know!
Love,
me
x0x0x0x0x0x
presents
I’ve been thinking for awhile about giving back to those who have helped supported me since I’ve been doing the lisa chronicles. So i decided that the coolest thing to give would be t-shirts to all the subscribers of the list. T-shirts are cool — we all love them. So what better way to honor those who helped me then to give them something back?
Here is the deal:
- There is currently 15 people subscribed to the list. Once I have hit 25 (I might change this to 50) subscribers by February 28th, 1999, I will be sending out an announcement to the list on gathering info (mailing address and t-shirt size).
- If I don’t hit my mark by that said date, I’ll be sending out an email anyway to those subscribed to the list and requesting specific information. Any t-shirts left (I make 50 shirts, there are 10 left as only 40 people are subscribed), will be SOLD for the cost of the shirt plus shipping and handling.
- Recap: If you want a shirt, and you are on the list, you get one FREE. If you are not on the list, and want a shirt, you will have to PAY for it.
The shirts will be cool. I’ve already done the design. It’s just a matter of me buying the supplies and making them.
Some things to consider:
- Going over the hit mark (25 or 50): At this point, I will do it on a first come first served basis. If I get more requests then what I’ve stipulated, I will work out a trade agreement or barter or something. I’m po’, so I can’t afford obviously to give shirts to everyone.
- Concern over privacy: this is understandable. I run four mailing lists and I have never had the inclination to sell my subscribers to anyone. I hate spam just like anyone else. If you don’t want me to know that you are reading this (as I’m familiar at who is coming to the site by dns/ip number — not necessarily the person) then I guess you lose out 🙂
If I’m leaving anything out, please let me know. I’ll add more as I think about this.
This is obviously a blatant request to get more subscribers to the list as well as readership. But no one said i had morals or ethics! 😉
Now, don’t be sending me information on how you want a shirt and blah blah blah now. Wait till February 28th or subscribe to the damn list! 😉