In which Lisa has committment issues

So, HGFH and I have been emailing back and forth. Despite me being totally upfront with her, she’s absolutely convinced I hate her. I don’t hate her, but I’ve known her for 17 years and we’ve never really sat down and talked about our differences. Ever. Oh, we TRIED but that got pushed out of the way with the quickness.

Especially considering we spent at least 10 years living in different states, it’s easier to push it to the side. So her emails to me are about how much I hate her (which, again, I never said). My emails to her are convincing her I don’t hate her, I just have a problem with what she does in some things but on the same hand I’ve also praised her for being my friend.

She wants to break off being friends from me.

Which, totally surprised me, seeing as she was the one who wanted closure on our argument (fine, i agree to that) but WANTED ME TO BE UPFRONT AND HONEST WITH HER ABOUT HOW I FEEL! I told her she was being passive/aggressive — again and that she needed to either stick with one thing or another. IE: If she wants to “review our friendship,” fine, I have no problems with that but don’t email me about how you don’t want to be friends with me and in the same email you want closure and work this out. You can’t have it both ways. I’m sorry, but hey, if you want me to be honest with you, I will.

Long story short, I told her to email me if she wants to pursue this and work it out or if she really wants to break it off. Just for the record, I don’t bear anyone ill will — ever. I don’t give that kind of power to others — I’ve learned only what that kind of power can do. I don’t hate — oh sure I’ve been catty but it’s not like I’m sitting there making voodoo dolls and sticking pins in people and wish them ill will. Shit don’t work out, fine and dandy, it doesn’t work out. People mistakenly get this idea that because I have strong opinions I’m also a hate monger and I’m not and I really resent the fuck out of it if you think I am.

Also on the update issue, tiglore and I finally met up on a date — and it didn’t work out. :/ We did part as friends and are planning on hooking up some weekend (this upcoming one or the next) to do a GodFather marathon and to generally hang out etc. He said I was now regulated to his order of “sisters” which I’ll take in high regard. Then the bastard tells me that if we had worked out, our next date he was going to bake cookies in shape of roses! Men! I tell you!

Sometime later on in the week, tiglore and I were talking about crush with Pip, the tattoo artist whose picture I had on LJ a few days ago. I told tiglore I would be hesitant about pursuing something with Pip simply because he works at a shop I frequent and it falls under the same category for me as dating people I work with — I just refuse to do it. It doesn’t appeal to me and I always seem to have drama surrounding my life so any way to minimize it, I will. The irony is that friday night as Pip was tattooing me, he was telling me how he would never pursue someone he tattooed unless it was outside the shop. LIke he met his girlfriend via the shop, but she pursued him at his second job. He’s afraid of the ink whores who come in just wanting to get with an artist for free ink.

But conversation was stilted. Like, every damn time I come in, we are ALWAYS talking and after I got my outer labias done, I ended up staying at the shop for another two hours while he was working because we were talking about everything under the sun. My appointment on friday got bumped because one of the owners told Pip he had to take an overflow appointment because another artist was running behind. I didn’t end up getting ink till later on in the evening and while he was tattooing me, we barely spoke a word to each other. Oh yah we talked but it was — different. I don’t know if it was because we had things on our minds or what but after a break when a bunch of the artists went out to have a smoke, I got to listen how they talk about women. OMFG, I felt so removed from my own sex by these skanky women that they date and thinking that I’ll be spending the rest of my life alone because I’m not skanky. I can’t win, I tell you! When we did talk, I asked Pip about his gf and her name is Heather. No offense or anything to any of the Heathers out there, but all I could think of was the movie Heathers. There are issues between those two and well, lets just say it’s not my place to get involved and so I will remain just the SINGLE ink slut who goes in to get inked.

In other news today, Paul IM’d me (my ex, not AQ Paul) to tell me he wants to come visit for Halloween because apparently Slayer is playing at the Orbit Room with Hatebreed and a few other bands on Halloween night. I was planning on going to go to ministerofsilly‘s house with him and his lovely wife lotus_flower and pass out candy. OR the shop usually throws a huge halloween bash as well. But hell, that would be cool to see slayer. I already bought my costume 🙂 Let’s just say it’s sexxxyyy. Anyways, either way, looks like I’ve got plans for Halloween. Now the interesting thing is that Paul has an extra ticket to see Eddie Izzard at the DC shows. Now HGFH and I were supposed to go to the Detroit show and I’m going to suppose if we are no longer friends this is off and Paul invited me to see the DC show, which falls during my Fall break from AQ. So, I might be in DC for a few days and if I do, I’ll be sure to let people know so we can do dinner or something 🙂

The weirdest thing happened this weekend: I had a 65+ year old woman tell me she loved my knee high black boots. Go figure.