mysterious twin

So I was thinking recently, thanks in part to a fantasy book I’ve been currently reading that is heavy towards politics about relationships and involvement.
Mainly the emotional involvement with friends and acquaintances. Where does one end and one begin?
Because lets face it, apparently when it comes to the ‘friend’ pool, i’ve got some sort of defect. I was thinking about how i collect people, like one would collect dolls or stamps. If one didn’t work out, oh well, there was always someone else would take their place. Perhaps I’m confusing friends with boyfriends?
No matter, the sentiment is the same. But i’m seriously beginning to believe that I do have some defect because it seems, if i ignore you, then i’m a terrible friend but if I spoil you, i’m buying your love.