i thought i would be slick last night and update before midnight so that i could get the timestamp to read for 9.3.00. However, i was 2 fucking seconds too late: [9/4/2000 12:00:02 AM | lisa rabey]
so, no update. heh. i lost all motivation 🙂
but wait there is more!
so i of course completely forget it IS monday and therefore this would be valid. I’m confused. It’s the holidays and I have no idea what the hell i am doing. 🙂 excuse me. It’s going to be the case of where I’ll be up till 3am and have to be to work at 11am and be confused all over again. Heh.
geek- haus.org is officially up. Go check it out. Please don’t email me telling me how cute it is. It’s not my idea. It’s paul’s. 🙂
Also, I’ve been going through my news folder and finally starting writing opinions again on bitchasshoe.org. So between those two, it should keep you informed for some time 😉
a few years ago, i had written a fairly lengthy email to a mailing list i was on in regards to how i had fantasized my life would be like when i was in high school in comparison to what was reality. to say i was disappointed is a small under statement by far. i was thinking about this recently when i was reading a book (also by said name in title) High Fidelity which chronicles the tales of a 35 year old guy who owns a record store and realizes, he needs to grow up. [side bar: why is it that this book has 184 user comments on it and yet almost everyone one of them HAS to give a brief synopsis? geez.]
Yes, this book the movie of the same name.
just so you know what kind of mood i’ve been in reading wise lately, i’ve been plowed through Model Behavior, American Psycho and Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil.
if that does not give you an idea of what my mind has been like, then i don’t know what does. 🙂
what was my point?
hell if i remember, or that CHiPS is on teevee right now, and after spending time talking to keth, setting up the new amazon associates partner thing and talking to paul about the new cgi crap for pronstar.org, i’ve completely lost my mind in what i am doing.
and i just got sidetracked reading keth’s page. Hon, you are NOT working for inreach anymore and dan doesn’t live in calgary anymore. it’s so time to update your page.
i keep wanting to do shift-a for some reason.
esc – shift a.
so where was i?
so i’m sitting here thinking about a 35 yo who hasn’t grown up yet, a 26 yo who is affluent and off killing half of manhattan and a black transvestite. and i’m wondering about me.
i read somewhere about an infamous pronstar who reinvented herself at 28 and viola there she was.
i’m irritated by an acquaintance of mine who spent quite of bit of time explaining via his journal how it was no longer a journal any more and i was like “this guy is spouting a bunch of crap” and i had written a rather mean and scathing email about how he was being a fake pretentious asshole and didn’t send it. i honestly didn’t see the point. he’s got scathing humour. i once told him he sold out, and he emailed me back saying that everything wasn’t about money and i had this long email in my head i wanted to write to him about how i wasn’t talking about money and giving up his artistic vision for the sake of something or another and then i realised: he’s a bright guy, he’s going to either ignore this for it’s tripe that he think it is or he’s going to respond and i realised that it was too much energy to tell him how i felt, even though, in the past that is something he had wanted from me. and it comes to me, i really don’t know this guy at all — not really. i know of him, and we’ve shared journal entries and talked to each other, but it’s not like we’ve made major impacts on each other. maybe we have and i haven’t paid attention to it but the point being is that i realised that i didn’t care about what he thought any more (one word or two)? i used to think he was a bright scathing wit and he still is, but he’s lost his edge. (And I’m a major chicken shit for writing this in *my* journal, but no one ever said life was fair).
it got me thinking about my own life.
Paul and I are happy.
I need to reiterate this because i’ve gotten several close friends asking me if we are on troubled waters. nope. paul and i are like the the proverbial married couple: fat and happy. both of us have gained weight and are actually fairly successful in our jobs. while we have little time to ourselves (das geek-haus is becoming a popular hang out place, enough to warrant a mailing list).
I’m alive. I’ve been thoroughly fooked 10 ways till Sunday (in a good way mind you), but I’m alive. Tired. But alive. 🙂
Anywho, a lot of changes have been taking place round these parts. So here is a listing of what’s going on:
- The cam has a permanent home! You can now found Paul and I swinging from the chandeliers at: www.geek-haus.org. We’ve broadcasted our first party from there and the came has been running pretty smoothly since we got the cable hooked up in Fairfax. I had automatically changed all the proceeding links so if you are not a cam watcher, become one 🙂
- If you’ve been sending me email to email@example.com, STOP! That domain *might* be going away in the future, and I need everyone to list me as either firstname.lastname@example.org OR email@example.com. While I own 6 domains, only one is being hosted at First World (formerly Slip.Net) and they have been screwing with accounts and could cancel me at anytime. So you’ve been warned ahead of time.
- Yesh, that’s the happy couple to your left. 🙂
- I’ve put up a new section called “Files” (located under alt.stuff->files). What this is a listing of stuff I’ve uploaded in the past like .wavs, .zips, etc that were part of a chronicle or what have you and became lost in the shuffle. So if you’re looking for stuff that I’ve mentioned to download in the past, it’s now listed in one brand spanking new place.
Friday 10.8.99: Leave Oakland and start the drive cross country.
Tuesday 10.12.99: Arrive in Atlanta.
Thursday 10.14.99: Paul arrives in Atlanta and we don’t leave the hotel for four days.
Sunday 10.17.99: Paul goes back to Miami, I drive to Virginia Beach.
Saturday 11.6.99: I move from Virginia Beach to Fairfax.
Monday 11.8.99: I start working at UUNet.
Tuesday 11.23.99: Paul arrives @ Dulles from Miami for Thanksgiving week.
Tuesday 11.30.99: Paul flies back to Miami to tie up loose ends.
Thursday 12.30.99: Paul flies back to VA for good. (tentative. could be sooner.)
those are the losers, and we are the champions!
as i write this, Pauly is now half way home back to Miami. I hate, HATE taking him to the airport. It always feels so final, even though I know he’ll be back. bah. Anyway, his flight was originally scheduled for Sunday but that got bumped to monday night as he had an interview with Andover yesterday afternoon. it was schweet! We got to have lunch with some of the guys from Andover as well as meet the people from ThinkGeek. I finally tasted my first bawls. Tasty stuff.
so we are driving to Regan National, and Queen comes on singing the above song. Paul and I were rocking out to it on 66 and it was just amusing how it seemed to fit our mood so perfectly. it’s like, when we are together, everything comes into play. everything works out, there are no problems, it just happens. Both of us are sitting back wondering when the shoe will drop and we’ll fall apart, but it’s like none of that has happened yet. we’ve had setbacks but it’s stuff that we can’t control. it had nothing to do with us. Paul also forced me to watch rasslin’ last night. 😮 that peegfooker! 🙂
We get to Regan National and find out that United had cancelled their flight to Miami and that they were bumping everyone to American Airlines, which was Pauls airline, and that flight was booked solid. Also, they had screwed up when Paul had made the changes and put down that the change was to December 29th, not November 29th. So we changed the flight to this morning and woke up at an ungodly hour to take him to Dulles (which, is thankfully, near our apartment) and sat there till his plane left the terminal. he’ll be back soon — unfortunately not soon enough.
The funny thing was that last night on our way back from Regan National, we drove by the Washington Monument. I was like yelling and screaming “Pauly, look! We /really/ are in Washington. We are really here!!” and Paul had this half-bemused look on his face and just said “purty”.
For me, it hasn’t really clicked in that we are making this work. I know that back in March when I met him that I had no idea or inclination that it was going to go this far. He said he knew it — it was just the matter of timing. He says he’s been obsessed with me since the beginning but it wasn’t until I had that crush on cartoon boy that he realized that he either snagged me or lose me. and thusly, the eternal obsessive/possessive dance begun again.
Many people have commented to me that they want to me to write about Shellys reaction, what else was going on, all the little nit picky stuff. I’m getting there, I just need time. I’m now settling into my fourth week at UUNet, the apartment is finally coming into shape. Pauly’s signed the lease and we have bills coming here in both our names. We also signed up for a joint checking account :o. It’s almost scary man.
Several people have said “well, now that you are happy, you won’t chronicles anymore.” It’s not that, it’s just that everything has simply been overwhelming. I mean, it’s not been a piece of cake putting this all together. We’ve had problems from the start: having to find the money for the down payment and rent for the first month. the phone getting shut off (accidently). Half of the appliances not functioning correctly in the apartment. Always seemingly feeling like we are out of money. The downstairs neighbors already complaining about the noise (oh, that was fun!). I mean, there has been a lot of static since day one. Just for once I choose not to write about it because I didn’t see the point.
That’s all going to change now. Now that I feel more comfortable with things falling into place, I feel more comfortable writing and telling the world about it once more. Good thing I didn’t go IPO as planned — my investors would be demanding their money back! 🙂